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It's been two weeks

8/19/2018

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I was told it takes 2 weeks for the anti-depressant to kick in so to speak.  It has  been two weeks.
I am feeling good. I like my new job. I've finally gotten to foster a kitten, second one will be picked up tomorrow. I have some long sought sewing projects under way. I'm working to get meditation back on a daily basis. And I'm setting aside time to read every day.
Many of these things are just things I like to do when I'm not drained by my theatre job though. So how much of it is not working my theatre job and how much is it the anti-depressant kicking in?  I'm not sure.
One of the key things for me is my fatigue and brain fog. And again working one job instead of two is always going to be less fatiguing, however, I'm not bubbling with energy either. I have been very mindful to not do anything too long, so that I don't overwhelm my system. I'm doing a larger variety of things but not for long periods of time. This works well for me. As to the brain fog I think that is improving. I have not had significant instances of memory failure and at my new job I am often keeping track of multiple tasks at once and staying on top of it for the most part.
As I read online there is a large time frame for the anti-depressant to take affect. So monitoring my energy levels seems to be the best way to know how it is going.
One key thing that has really made me feel good lately is taking the time while I go to sleep and wake up to visualize the life I want. I'm a visual person anyway but seeing what I want happening is a great boost.  Those times between wakeful hours and sleeping hours are really good to let the better feeling sink in.
I think next I will look into Introverts and depression to see some of the theories as to why so many introverts are affected by this.
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It's been a while...but here is some things to share

8/5/2018

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It's been a while I know. I have had a hard time knowing what to write and focus on. I have struggled with my path for over 20 years. Not very good at this adult-ing thing. And in that time I have had a lot of aches, pains, and ongoing fatigue that just clouds my brain and energy that I've allowed to get in my way. I've talked to doctors several times about it and nothing was discovered physically. I try to do meditations and tapping which are good for short bursts but I have a hard time staying focused because of this fatigue. This last year has gotten worse - the fatigue, the body pain, the brain fog - so I brought it up to my current doctor. We did the standard blood tests, we talked about hormones and introversion and her conclusion was that I suffer from a subtle depression with social isolation and so she is starting me on anti-depressants. 
This all spoke to me in terms of what a lot of introverts go through so I thought I'd blog about my experience in case that helps anyone else out there. Our brains are so powerful they can create physical reactions to stress, trauma, and just being in survival mode for so long. This of course is just my experience and my thoughts, if anything rings true for you please talk to your doctor!  I think you'd be surprised how many of them are also introverts. Also find a doctor with which you do feel comfortable talking. This was a big thing for me! I like my doctor, she's easy to talk to and relates to the whole introvert thing because she is too. As a bonus the clinic has eCare so I can see results, email questions, make appointments without having to make phone calls - an introvert plus.
I have just started the anti-depressants. She wants me on an SSRI (selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitor). I think of it like retraining my body to recognize and use serotonin (It is believed to help regulate mood and social behavior, appetite and digestion, sleep, memory, and sexual desire and function. ~Medical News Today). I just started and it takes a few weeks to kick in. My hope is to have some results and experiences that you all can relate to if I can keep up with the blogging. My doctor feels this anti-depressant will help me focus and get a step up so that I can take over from there.
That morning, before I saw her, I was thinking "I know I need to get into a higher energy flow to attract the higher energy flow things I want and need in life, but it's a catch 22.  If I just had a way to get a step up, see some progress...." I can make things better!
Please comment, share, or ask questions if there is something you want to know or express.
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    Hey it's Karen, these are just some thoughts that help me!

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